Going back to therapy has been a big help. Unrelated, I actually started doing “morning pages” a la The Artist’s Way while I was on vacation. If you’re not familiar, morning pages are 3 handwritten pages you write when you wake up (I do it whenever I can steal 1/2 hour). You write and write and write until you fill up the pages. It can be nonsense or it can be good stuff. The point is to clear out the cobwebs in your brain.
For me, the added benefit is connecting with my actual emotions. I’ve spent my entire life trying to disregard my big emotions by either stuffing them down, turning them to anger, or drinking them away. This exercise is getting me back in touch with what I’m actually feeling. I’ve got a long way to go but I’m noticing a difference already. I’ll go back to this subject another time.
You’re not really supposed to go back and read your morning pages but I marked this one because I thought I was hitting some important stuff here.
(I’m going to use my morning pages as background for art journal stuff. )