I just signed the lease. And promptly got sick. Thank goodness for Xanax.

• Check my breathing.
• Chest empty.
• Let the tide move through.

Feelings rise. Pause to acknowledge. Let them say their piece.

• Check my breathing.
• Chest full.
• Let the tide move through.

My eyes are clear. My mind is clear. This time is clear.

No big blowout. No fight. Not a thing.

No tears. No yelling. Not a thing.

Disagreements cycling more quickly every time.

Churning and ascending.

Back to the beginning.

• Check my breathing.
• Chest empty.
• Let the tide move through.

I have worked SO HARD. Dived down to the murky water. Untangling weeds.

I cried already years ago. I ached and longed. Horizon always empty.

• Check my breathing.
• Chest full.
• Let the tide move through.

Today felt especially dark –

The pit of my stomach sodden with not sadness,

But grief – heavy and sticky.

He stopped wearing his ring;

I have been recategorized.

I am the ghost in the house.

I am over fed and under covers –

Piling on soft armor;

But I am steadily deepening my roots in the earth.

Back into my body.

• Check my breathing.
• Chest empty.
• Let the tide move through.

I just signed the lease.

I have a new address.

Back into my body.

• Check my breathing.
• Chest full.
• Let the tide move through.
• Check my breathing.
• Chest empty.
• Let the tide move through.